6 Questions You Need To Ask When Your Approach To Dating Isn’t Working

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A lot of people have a hard time dating because they set high expectations for the people that they date. Some even have a checklist of things that they want out of a partner, and find it difficult to deviate from that list no matter how great the other qualities of a person are.

Are you this type of person?

Do you immediately count someone out just because they aren’t the right height, or aren’t as set in their career as you would like? While it’s always important to have certain expectations out of a partner, a laundry list of needs may not be the right approach.

If you’re ready to make changes and want to approach dating in a different way, then it might be time to start thinking about yourself. After all, would you date you?  Do you have qualities that other people seek when looking for a partner to spend the rest of their lives with?

You have to remember that your date is checking off that list just like you, and you may not be passing with flying colors. By shifting the focus from others to yourself, you may be able to make some positive changes that lead to finally meeting and keeping someone!

Now that you’re ready to focus on a different type of dating approach, answer the following questions as honestly as possible.

How do you look?

Of course you know what you look like, but what type of impression are you giving off to your date? Try and imagine yourself from an outside perspective, and dress in the way that gives off the impression that you’re going for.

Are you punctual?

Nobody wants to wait around, so make sure you show up on time. This will give your date the impression that you’re reliable and that you are taking the date seriously.

What topics do you talk about?

Try to bring up neutral subjects that will spark conversation.  Let the conversation naturally flow, and if you end up finding common ground, that can give you both a topic you can relate to.

How do you make your date feel?

Are you conducting your date like you are actually checking their qualities off of a list? If you are, then you are going to turn your date away from the very start.

Don’t interrogate them with questions right away.  Instead, fit questions into the natural flow of the conversation.  Dates should be fun.  They shouldn’t feel like a job interview.

Are you talking about yourself too much?

Anyone can make the mistake of talking about themselves too much while they are on a date, and that’s why it’s important to consciously remember that you’re there to get to know the other person.

Spark conversation with unique topics and don’t be afraid to get to know them!

Do you have the traits that you’re looking for in a partner?

If you’re looking for someone who is affectionate, generous, kind, fair, educated, positive, committed, and career-oriented, then it’s important that you see those same traits in yourself.  Of course you both don’t need to be the exact same, but remember that your date is probably still looking for general good qualities in someone, so you should take a self-assessment to see what you have to offer.

Nobody said dating is easy, but it can lead to a wonderful new relationship if you open yourself up. Once you know what you have to offer, you’ll have more confidence and a better outlook on dating!

Why Did She Choose Him And Not Me? The Reason Women Bolt After Just A Few Dates

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Have you ever met a girl that seemed to be absolutely perfect? So much so in fact, you found yourself falling for her after just a few dates?

You fantasize about spending time with her, having passionate sex with her, and figuring out how to convince her to be your girlfriend.  You can’t wait to bust out some of your favorite moves and attraction techniques from the Girlfriend System.

But then, seemingly out of nowhere, your excitement turns to disappointment…

You text her to find out what her plans are for the weekend and she tells you she is going to a baseball game. All you can think about is, why didn’t she invite ME?

Your brain tells you to start looking for ways to fill up her calendar with fun activities for you and her. You desperately try to get her to commit to dinner dates, comedy shows, and sporting events weeks in advance.

The next time you see her, things just don’t seem to be the same. She acts as if she still likes you, but she’s just not as interested in spending time together. What happened? Everything seemed fine before.

Hopefully I don’t need to tell you that your obsessive behavior was NOT a major turn on for her, but trust me I understand. When you really like someone, it’s natural to want to spend all your time with them.

The problem arises when you act on these feelings too soon. Forcing yourself into someone’s life can be intimidating and make the person feel trapped.

So what is the best solution?

The answer may not be as complicated as it seems. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes.

How would you feel if someone you didn’t really know was pressuring you into a relationship?  Or better yet, how would you feel if that same person printed out a calendar of all the fun things they had planned for you and expected you to be on board?

Take a minute to think about it: if she had a great time on the first date, isn’t she naturally going to want to see you again in the near future? As this pattern continues, I can almost guarantee you it would lead to some type of solid relationship.

On the other hand, if she was a nervous wreck the entire time, and tried to force you to spend more time with her… you would most likely avoid her at all costs and not want to ever see her again.

Here is one of the most important lessons you will ever learn on what you can do to avoid ending up with a restraining order and scaring your perfect girl away.  It can be summed up in just 4 words…

Live for the moment

The first few dates of any potential relationship should be fun and never involve any pressure to commit to something more serious.

All of your energy should be focused on being happy and making sure she is having a great time every MOMENT you are together. You can start by smiling, being courteous, and doing things that make her laugh.

Instead of trying to plan out the next date, find a way to drop hints about things you are doing in the near future that she will be sure to be interested in. Women typically love to talk and will tell you what their interests are without you even having to ask. Use this to your advantage and find a way to unintentionally invite her on a next date doing an activity guaranteed to peak her interest.

Think of this as trying to catch a fish. The fun activity that you want her to attend with you is the bait and you want to casually cast out your line (the invitation) until she bites (accepts the invitation).

For example, she has already mentioned that she loves sushi. You know of a great Japanese steak house in your local area with the best sushi around. Try saying something like this:

“Wait, have you ever been to the sushi bar at Kobe Japanese Steakhouse? It is out of sight! I have got to take you there the next time we hang out. They were ranked as the top 5 Japanese Steakhouse in the country! The sushi is to die for. I bet you haven’t had anything better!”

See how you were able to subtly mention taking her out on a second date, but you did not force her to commit? You managed to show her you are a good listener by mentioning a restaurant in line with her preferences, and you let her know you are definitely interested in seeing her again by saying “the next time we hang out.”

Another approach would to be casually invite her to something that she may not be use to doing, but she was intrigued by it when you mentioned it.

For example, let’s say you really enjoy hiking and rock climbing. She seemed to be really interested when you were talking about it. Express to her how much fun it is and tell her you would be happy to take her to your favorite indoor rock climbing wall facility the next time you see her.

She will love the fact that you are inviting her to do something that is directly related to your personal life.  Whether the next date is at the sushi bar or the rock climbing wall, you can rest assured there WILL BE a second date, and you just gained some major bonus points.

She will also love that fact that you are confident in yourself. What do I mean?  The fact that you seemed so sure she would love to spend more time with you that you subtly mentioned a “next time.”

By the time you reach the end of your first date, her mind will be full of positive images of fun and happiness every time she thinks about you. She will talk about you to her friends, family members, and coworkers. And the most important thing, it will make her look forward to making more memories with you in the future.

The last thing I want to leave with you is a way to remember this lesson. It may sound a little corny, but it will help you always remember.

When you start dating someone you really like, think of the story of the tortoise and hare. Although the rabbit was clearly the better opponent at the start of the race, he failed to win because he was not focused on what was important, “winning the race.”

I am saying that to say this: it does not matter if there are other guys competing for the attention of your crush. They could have more money, be better looking, and even have more style, but if you focus on keeping her happy and paying attention to her interests, the other guys will not be able to compete!

Stay focused on living for the moment and avoid coming on too strong. Keeping all this in mind will ensure you get the girl you desire EVERY TIME!

Let Him Watch! Why You Should Keep The Lights On During Sex

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Next time things heat up, do not stop to turn the lights off – keep them on!

There are a few different reasons why couples are intimate in total darkness. One of the most common reasons women run to turn the lights off is because they are not comfortable with their bodies.

Do not let the pressure from the media control your sex life. Embrace your body. Let him watch. He would not want to be intimate with you if he wasn’t attracted to you.

When things are getting hot and heavy, seeing you naked in the light isn’t going to decrease his sexual desire for you.  Quite the opposite…

Reasons to let him watch:

  • He can see that you are enjoying yourself
  • He can get a visual of himself having sex with you
  • Giving him the opportunity to adore and please your body promotes healthy development of his ego
  • He gets the view in every position
  • He releases more feel good hormones when he sees you naked, which intensifies the pleasure he experiences

Confidence Is Sexy

It turns him on when you are confident. Some men claim that confidence is one of the sexiest things about a woman.

Being needy and requiring constant reassurance can be exhausting to a man. Most men are not as critical about a woman’s body as she would be about her own physique.  Few things kill the mood as fast as, “Hey hunny.  Can we stop for a second so I can turn out the lights?”

When a woman is confident, her man notices and the carefree energy draws him closer. Be confident that he is not even noticing your stretch marks; he’s too busy watching and getting pleasure from how much he’s pleasing you.

If you are too worried about covering yourself, there is no way you can relax and truly enjoy sex. You may be avoiding specific positions he likes because you are insecure. Confident women are more fun because they embrace their sexual needs and desires.

A man doesn’t just want to have sex with you; he wants you to have sex with him. Great sex is giving and receiving sexual pleasure. A confident woman is more likely to enjoy herself and touch more often – him and herself. He wants to see that you are having fun and are happy!

Don’t be afraid to express yourself during sex. Be open and try new things!

Accept his compliments. Believe him when he says you are beautiful. Let him know that you appreciate his comments.

You should never begin talking about what you dislike about your body after he compliments you. Instead, keep the list to yourself and use them as encouragement. Work on accepting things you cannot change and realize only you can change your attitude towards your body.

Satisfy Him And Stimulate His Five Senses

The number one thing that turns a man on is your enthusiasm about having sex with him.  Enthusiasm can be gauged by how much you are enjoying sex. He wants to know that you want it.  Your pleasure feeds his ego and makes him feel masculine.

Express yourself; smile, make eye contact, touch, moan, and signal to him that you want more. He can’t see you when the lights are out.  He can only feel, smell, taste, and maybe hear you. Give it all to him and let him see you.

Take Things To The Next Level Using The Language Of Desire

The Language of Desire by Felicity Keith helps you embrace your sexuality, feel sexier, and be more confident, knowing that what you are doing is what he desires. Blow his mind by talking dirty to him and use these secret sexy techniques that will satisfy his deepest desires.

How To Win Her Over On Your First Date

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Winning the attention and praises of a woman doesn’t have to be difficult. In most cases, it only requires doing a few simple things that leave her impressed and eager for the next date.

Here are 8 to get you started:

Be A Gentleman

Women are impressed by men who pull chairs and open doors for them. They might seem like simple chivalries, but they provide women with crucial insight into what the future holds.

If a man fails to show a general respect for women or lacks certain gentleman-like qualities, the relationship will be doomed from the very start. In most cases, such qualities must be there from the beginning.

Show Interest

It’s very important for a man to listen as much as he talks. Don’t let the entire conversation be about you.  A woman should feel that you are truly interested in learning more about her.

Be Well Groomed

A man has to be well-groomed because most women have a keen eye for detail. Simple things like showering, ironing your clothes, shaving and making your hair are some of the aspects they look at when they first meet a man.

Some of the other minor areas that women usually focus on include polished shoes and groomed hands.

Maintain Interesting Conversation

Nobody likes people who swear or use vulgar language all the time, especially women. These are some of things you should absolutely avoid on your first date.

Make sure that the conversation remains positive and up-beat. As a result, she will be able to see the good things about you.

Give Her Sincere Compliments

As we all know, compliments will get you where you need to be. Everyone woman loves to get them.  However, they must be simple and sincere.

For instance, “You have beautiful eyes” is a much better option than “Damn! You’re hot!”

Show Her Your Fun Side

The process of knowing each other should be fun and easy. Come up with various activities that allow you to know each other better without any added pressure.

If she feels comfortable around you, she will definitely open up more.

Flirt With Her

Women absolutely love flatteries. You can ask her questions, encourage her or joke with her.  The main point is to be flirtatious.

Make the conversation a bit more interesting by steering clear of generic questions. This will definitely leave a lasting impression.

Touch Her

If your date is going well and you are in a comfortable setting, you can lightly touch her. This may be on her arm or on the tips of her fingers.

You can rest assured that this simple act will not go unnoticed. It will also give you some idea of how comfortable she is with these kinds of gestures.

If she doesn’t pull away, you should take it as a good sign that things are going well.

If she pulls away, back off.  She may not be into you, or she may simply be undecided.

Are You Always Attracted To The Wrong Men? Here’s How To Stop Getting Hooked On Mr. Trouble

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You are probably familiar with the famous quote by Albert Einstein:

“Insanity is doing the same thing over and over again while expecting a different result.”

The same is true regarding relationships. We live in a time where many women are attracted to potential partners, although deep inside every one of them knows that he is not the right guy for her.

You have probably had the same experience.

You laid your eyes on that sexy guy at the counter and you were mesmerized to find out that he drives a Porsche 901. This was unfortunately a disaster, just like many other relationships you had before.

You might wonder why you give 6 precious months of your life to this person who never loved or cared about you. Well, the naked truth is that even though you didn’t choose it, you still agreed to it.

You may think most men out there are drug addicts, have problems with pornography, or fall into the category of abusive men. It seems that only nerdy and goofy men are able to show some respect. Fortunately, that’s not true.

There are many good looking men who are eager to enter in a relationship with you and love you. You just need to know how and where to find these precious men.

Are You Really Attracted To Him?

This is what you need to know before letting yourself  get “hooked” by the wrong guy:

1. Agree not to date other people

You need someone who cares about your feelings and loves you with all his heart. Before starting out with a guy you feel attracted to, discuss with him about dating other people.

You don’t want an open relationship, but you want to ensure he will never want to cheat on you.  Make your expectations and agreements clear from the start.

2. Deal with the issue

It’s never too late to solve this problem. In case your man has already cheated on you because you haven’t established the boundaries, you still have the option of “redeeming him”.

3. Do not let yourself become addicted

You want a man, but you don’t want to be addicted to him. Your emotional addiction might destroy you from the inside, especially if you already have strong feelings for your man.

4. Think about your decisions

Remember, you are the one who takes the decision to accept a guy. No one forces you to choose a certain man. You do have control over your decision.

5. Find the reason

Finally, ask yourself why do you accept and are attracted to the wrong men? Is it your lack of self- esteem? Your previous relationships? Maybe your own communication issues?

Regardless of the reason, try to pinpoint it and eliminate it out of your life.

Getting A Girl To Date You – The Struggles Of Love

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Ah…the struggles of love. Everyone has – at least once in their lifetime – struggled with their love life. Especially when it comes to getting your crush to like you back enough to actually date you.

Everyone has felt like the most undesirable person to exist in the world when the person they like does not even bother looking at them. It is natural, even more so for men. But that does not mean it is totally helpless. Getting a girl to date you can be tough but not impossible – if one knows how to strategize.  For step-by-step guidance see this GFAS review.

Contrary to popular belief, being a jerk does NOT work. Maybe it will snag the girl’s attention but 9/10 times that relationship will not succeed. It is based on a lie and no matter how much you convince yourself all’s fair in love and war, it still makes you an immature person.

To get a girl to date you, you have to be yourself, you have to make her like who you are rather than who she wants you to be. Let’s plan out a strategy for you in steps to help you get that girl you have been thinking about all day (if a woman is reading this, no, OF COURSE, we are not that emotional pffht…really).

Step 1: This is more of a warning, more of a don’t than a do. Do NOT stalk her no matter how much you want to. Seriously, we don’t know how they manage to look all sweet and romantic in movies but it does not work in real life. You will probably end up creeping her out.
Getting that out of the way, we get to

Step 2: Friends of friends. You might have heard many couples tell people how they met their partner through mutual friends. Yep, that works like a charm. It is the best way to get a girl to know that you exist anyway.

Step 3: Be nice and sweet but keep it moderate – again, you may have heard that girls like jerks but mature girls know better. If you doubt that they like sweet guys, just check that statistics of how many women adore chick flicks and you’ll get the idea that they DO like sweet guy. But not overly sweet, they want an understanding man, not cavities.

Step 4: This might just be the most important step depending on the kind of guy you are. Let me put it subtly…TAKE CARE OF YOUR HYGIENE.

Girls do not like messy guys (unless the messy is the kind of good messy, and we’re not getting into that confusion) – keep yourself clean and make sure you smell nice, girls eat (smell?) that up.

Step 5: Be friends first, date later. Be a good friend to her but keep a distance, so that you don’t get into the friend zone. Make her laugh, pay attention to her, but do not be around all the time or available all the time, either. Then, when you feel like the time is right, find a suitable (preferably sweet) way to ask her out. If she isn’t insane, chances are she will accept it.

Good luck, misters!